Guys, I am back! With a refreshing new story.
Disclaimer: Firstly, the names used in the story are purely unreal; the story is an art of fiction. Any resemblance found to be co-incidental is purely intentional. Secondly, please don’t read this if you are a James Hardly Chase fan; you might just kill me for my attempt at suspense I’ve tried to bring in here. Thirdly, come what may, please don’t tell your parents that I write such crap because this story involves material that may require you to be over 25 (In Maharashtra), but we were in Kanpur so 21 years is also fine. Fourthly, Smoking is injurious to health. Fifthly do not mix the following: different brands or types of drinks (Cocktail ho jayega), drinking and driving (accident ho jayega) and girls and drinking (wohi hoga jo mazure khuda hota hai). With this I welcome you to a post-MUN disaster:
What is the worst thing that can happen? Death? That’s not going to happen here? Or is it?
Why did I come here again? Shit!
Anyways, I have photography as a career option if this one screws up.
Can he screw my career?
Those words repeated in my brain in a rewind, playback mode and replayed in loop mode, ‘I will screw you so hard… [He takes a pause for the effect] you won’t be able to walk!’, these were the words of the Head of the Festival. His silver ID card reflected in the street lights as he walked towards me; ‘Meet me at SAC’, he said ‘Yes, Sir’ (Hail Hitler! - would have been a better response, I smiled at my own joke)
I was walking towards the SAC or the Student Activity Center where the whole events of the past few days met me on the road. This is where it all started.
------------------------------------FLASHBACK----------------------------------
I called Venkatesh Raman the head of the IITKMUN at Antaragni 2011, where I had come to Vice Chair the HRC.
‘Dude, I am here again! At SAC, waiting for you!’- I yelled (I was kinda noisy at the Hospi Desk)
‘I’ll be there in a min… I get your ke…. Along!’- He yelled from the other side.
‘Venky, what? Get my what?’ – all I could hear was the beep…
After a few minutes and more I meet everyone who had come concerning the MUN, I’d called up on my boys or my juniors who had arrived a day earlier (To pick up my bags, Of course!)
Post the meet and amazing lunch I went to my PRIVATE room at IIT K Hostel where we were provided accommodation. The Indian Railway berths don’t fit me guys, nor by height or by width, I always wonder how they can sustain my weight. I instantly dosed off.
*DRONG**DRONG*
*DRONG**DRONG*
*DRONG**DRONG*
My alarm rang! And read the reminder, IITKMUN inauguration and Delegate dance, (Blackberry has amazing synchronizations)
An sms read, ‘Guys please come to LHC 17 at 1030 for a meeting before the inaugural! - Venkatesh’; ‘Aye Aye Captian’ I replied.
I saw a lot of new and old faces at the inaugural, ones who had irritated us (the HRC- EB and IITK Org B), once who I had stalked on Facebook (All you need is their name) after the allotment lists came out and once who were in the Delhi or the Mumbai Circuit (I suddenly felt a sense of pride, huh! I’ve done both)
2 days of Model UNing went like a wave of the tsunami, with eruptive double-meaning jokes, poker nights and amazing debate; sadly the resolution didn’t come out really well! But that’s another story, at the awards ceremony we undoubtedly stated the best committee; it was true!]
I made that a cute little friend ( who calls me a smoke buddy) who was in the International Press reminded me of my PICK@TRIX days (A name that we coined for Photo Documentaries in our school days) and farewell. It was over. But what they say is true - it’s not over till the fat lady sings.
A baccha or junior from the ’16 batch, let’s call him Nubie had won the High Commendation award and Nubie II (baccha) had won a special mention, and I had the most successful and fun committee ever; the win demanded celebration and the celebration was incomplete without Royal Stags, Old Monks and White Mischiefs. (The girls came as an - ek saath ek free offer!) So there we were, singing Floyd, Afterglows and other hits as we finished a Royal Stag which was topped by Shots. After a few more hours the unthinkable happened! The girls got super drunk. We had to send them back and continue our small party. So we got up to fix the girls (NEXT time never mix girls and drinks- I swore myself, seriously guys! Haven’t you guys seen Pyaar Ka Panchnama? A must-watch! Hehehe!)
So there we were again! Trying to get them in senses, or let’s say attempting to do well! We did fix one, the least drunk of them all back to her hostel.
‘Whoosh, 1 down 2 to go-Nubie II said;
‘Yeh dude, good job! Where iii?.. Oooooh Shit! Cops!’, I saw an SIS jeep patrolling near our spot.
‘I have my passport there, it’s in my bag!’- Nubie II said trembling, he continued ‘Dude tell those two to hide or run away with the girls’.
‘Yeh! Man!’ I replied and ran.
It took me a few steps to see that the girls were right there around the place and had to be relocated. I shrieked ‘Guys get the fuck outta here, the SIS guys are here!’
It took me 10 minutes to get the situation in hand and returned back at the spot to find more cops (now on cycles) circulating the crime scene (the yellow ribbons were the only thing missing! I imagined, what would they write on them? ‘IIT K DOSA – DO NOT CROSS LINE'; DOSA- Director of Student Affairs, LOL! I laughed on my own joke) When I was back I saw, Nubie and Nubie II busted and in the police van!
I called up Nubie II, to ask what was happening. He disconnected. He called once again and someone else spoke, he threatened me to meet him, and there I was with him and he had asked me to come to SAC when he said those words, ‘I will screw you so hard… [He takes a pause for the effect] you won’t be able to walk!’
----------------------------FLASHBACK ENDS----------------------------------
I was waiting for him and then he called as to where I was, I told him I was waiting.
I was called into a room that seemed like a Secret room for administration purposes with loads of chairs, tables, laptops, sleeping organisers (for once they were sleeping) and pin-drop silence.
We were grilled by him as he smoked in style, and lit OUR cigarette packet in style. When all this was going on, my mind kept on thinking ‘he calls my principal, tells her, she calls my parents, tells them, they call, tells me! Can’t he just talk to me! I mean avoid the call roaming charges for all of us. TRAI has only considered the cancellation of roaming charges a week ago! (Just a fact)
He later reminded us and asked for the names of the girls who were with us. He demanded! NAAY! He blackmailed us. We didn’t tell any names though. Nubie was back in his senses after drinking the specially ordered bottle of Bisleri. I tried to establish a negotiation but he was an engineer, he wouldn’t have understood the helpful words of an honest law student! Who knows he must have had some profit, I would have sent him a bill of consultancy charges though! LOL! (why am I making these goes at such moments!)
However, he didn’t listen to me, demanding the names of the girls. However, he found out those names with the help of my recent contacts in BBM and within seconds his assistants found out the information about the girls and guys with us. He told us that he’ll leave us with a fine. We paid and came out of SAC. It was over. The longest day of my life had ended.
Nubie got a bit emotional but was consoled by Mr Head of Anataragni who was chilling on his bike on his way back and told him that he will get his certificates and award and that the blackmail was just a threat.
Poor Nubie.
First Year,
First Festival,
First MUN,
First Party of the fall semester,
First drink outside home campus,
First award,
First time getting caught,
First-time accused,
First punishment,
First liability as an offender and
First time acquitted,
First time inside a police van,
First time getting it all done in a night;
Anyone would have broken down at any stage let alone a novice to it. But he stood still (drinks help!) and he faced it all. HATS OFF! The tears that came were that of joy? Sorrow? Regret? Freedom? I really don’t know; they just said one thing: It's over!
EPILOGUE: Guys nothing bad really happened we enjoyed our days at IIT Kanpur and laughed at whatever shit had happened.
The moral of the story that I learnt was: WHEN YOU KNOW DEATH IS NOT GOING BE THE ULTIMATUM ... LIFE WILL FIGHT FOR YOU AND YOU WILL WIN OR GET OUT OF THE SITUATION.
Also guys Sunidhi Chauhan sang in the concert marking the end of IITK – Antaragni.
The fat lady had sung.
It was officially over.
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